Talking To Children About Loss

Kia ora e hoa,

I’ve been thinking about how hard it is to know what to say when a child is grieving. Many of us worry about getting it wrong but most of the time, children need honesty more than perfect words.

Start simple. Tell them the truth in a way that matches their age and understanding. “Nana has died” is clearer and kinder than vague phrases like “gone to sleep” or “passed away.” Clear words help children make sense of what’s happening.

Give them space for questions, even if the answers are hard. It’s okay to say, “I don’t know.” What matters most is that they feel safe to talk and that their feelings are respected.

Children often take their lead from the adults around them. If they see you acknowledging grief while still carrying on with daily life, they learn that sadness is real but survivable.

However you choose to talk with your child, remember, you don’t have to carry this alone. Whakaaio is here, standing beside whānau whenever support is needed.

Warm regards,

The Whakaaio Team